I lost my marbles.
Let’s start from the beginning.
The last time I had consumed lsd was before this semester started.
Now, it’s October 20th. What can I say? I am glad that I took a break. Now, I feel worlds better than I was a mere 10 hours ago. Wow, what a nice taste of reality that was.
I honestly find it impossible to say what I want to say at this point.
Blahhhhhh. People, wake up. It’s 7am.
I usually just delete what I type, but I guess that I am feeling risky at this odd hour of 7am. Blah, it’s a god damn Sunday. Who cares. To the person reading this, HELLO. Good morning to you. How was your night? That’s great.
R, J, S, and myself decided to make music for a change instead of the typical “trip in the woods”.
In all honesty though, I can say that music speaks loud, and to be completely fucking honest here. I wish I could be completely fucking honest right here (wink wink self). el oh el
For once it didn’t rain. Out of how ever many hits I have done this year it has rained. every. single. time.
it didn’t rain.
I guess the lack of rain spoke to me for once.
I listen to the woods. When it rains, you hear the rain. It’s loud. It’s dancing everywhere. But when it’s not raining, you can hear the wind. The wind. It’s quiet but it’s still there.
If anything, I want to be the autumn air.
The air that creeps up on a warm stretch of skin, and reminds the skin that it’s alive. That cool cool breath of what is to come. It can maintain its innocence for the time being. Autumn never tells what winter has to come, but it is a sly transition. Kissing summer goodbye felt like it should have happened sooner. I cannot over emphasize how much the autumn air can carry more beauty and story. I guess I can feel myself changing. To be honest, the depression came back like no other. But then again, I have let my guard to many things that I don’t let usually happen. That’s autumn saying hello to I. My new ally it feels like. To the sober minds reading this that can fathom what is being said, I wish we could have this conversation in person. Till then, cheers.
But to be the autumn air. The autumn air. I can say that a million times. But I have things on my chest that are left unsaid. That’s not like me, you. That’s not like me at all. I guess that’s the one thing I cannot honestly get over. I have allowed for myself to just… I don’t know. I just need to get a lot of stuff off of my chest.
I have been writing music. If I could play what I heard the wind do last night… Then I can only imagine.
I guess all I want in life right now is someone who can appreciate the same things I do to the core. I need to be more social. I have all the answers to my problems.
I need to stop giving a fuck. That’s that. The problem is that is not who I am.
I’m going to go with autumn and stare at all the collar bones on all the pretty girls. But I will forever remain a gentleman.